Sunday

I'm sitting here this morning trying to wake up, and its not working, I'd rather lay in bed today - all day. I know thats not good for me so I made myself get up. I'm feeling myself sink kinda low since I've been dealing with my own childs depression, its really getting to me. Luckily I have an appointment this week to my own doc.

Every day is like a roller coaster right now with D, my son. One moment he is happy, the next someone or something has hurt his feelings and he is either in tears or doing the silent treatment and looks like a wounded puppy. Last night he went to bed insecure and wounded, woke up happy and loveable and ready to go for the day, I just never know what to expect anymore. And that a lone can drain a person, besides your child hurting in a way that you cant fix is a lonely and depressive feeling.

We went to the lake yesterday to a birthday party, I didnt want to go, but I know that getting out being with friends is the best thing to do, and I am glad that we went. My boys went swimming and my better half slipped on the dock and hurt his wrist and finger. Must have been bad cause he NEVER goes to the doctor and this morning at 8 he was waking me up telling me he was going to the ER to get it x-rayed. 2 1/2 hours later its not broken just fractured or sprained really badly and its in a splint and he has a prescription for pain meds. He says it really hurts him today and cant move his fingers without a shooting pain into his wrist. That brings along another worry. We farm, and he NEEDS both hands every day......

We are supposed to go back to the lake, the weather is supposed to break in the next few hours and the sun is supposed to shine, so if it does, we are going back and doing some boating and swiming and fishing, the sun will do us all good, and being with much loved friends will help us all get our minds off our worries.

"One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time."- Nancy Astor